One of the tricks the pick up artists use, is to look “special” – like wearing a funny hat or quirky sunnies. Another trick is to say something slightly rude, since this will trigger the girls to defend them selves, which means they suddenly spend energy on the man and try to win him over. Huh.

Men often ask me if manipulating and the tricks work, and I must admit they do. A while ago I wore cat ears to show my support for an AFL team (not that I know anything about it, but I like cats…) and I have never had so many people approach me. I think it was because I was so obviously inviting people to talk or comment.

The “hard to get” game works too when you flirt. If you don’t call too soon or reply on texts too eagerly, you appear too “easy”. Mysterious and unpredictable behaviour works. Playing hard to get works. It’s all because it makes our brains want it more when there’s a shortage. It’s built in us. It’s human. It’s inevitable. Girls run to boys like happy puppies if they have avoided them for a while (or just don’t like them) and men love the challenging snobbish girls who don’t want them. One client said he tested the girls. If they accepted to have sex with him too soon, they were “just not girl friend material”. He still slept with them though.

As a love coach I help people be strong, confident and happy, so they’ll attract love without quick fixes and cool pick up lines. When you feel crazy good about yourself love can’t stay away from you. How to flirt with success? Feel good from within. When you do that, you can add on some flirting tricks:

-  Mirror the person you talk to. Copy gestures and face movements, words and pace. It will make the person think you understand them. Do this smart and not too obvious though.

-  Touch. Today many people are scared to death of getting rejected and they avoid showing interest, out of fear of getting a “no”. A touch is a signal that it’s ok.

- Girls, tilt your head a bit and play with your hair. That is a signal to the boys.

- Flatter and ask questions. We all love chatting about ourselves, and we love compliments even if we blush and feel uncomfortable when they are thrown at us. Nice words stick like tattoos.

-  Say something unexpected, beyond “what do you work with?”, which is still a question 80 per cent of men use.

-  Smile and be warm and open. Research show that we are more likely to contact a smiling person. Other studies have also shown that we prefer people who look straight at us. We think they are more attractive!

-  Be nice but say good bye after a while. Make them want to come back for more.

Funny hat or not, the main thing is that you actually say hello. Most singles never even start conversations with anyone outside their own group. They never get talked to either. I have super hot girl friends and the amount of men approaching them during an evening out is low. People today are just too shy and don’t want too loose their faces and look dumb.

But believe me; if you take the risk you get the chance. All of the men or women you say hello to won’t swoon and be the One. Some of them will be snotty and perhaps even cruel. But hey, learn from your mistakes; contact those who give you an encouraging smile and get up again. Everyone gets rejected, but how will you ever find the perfect person if you are a quitter?

How to flirt? Just do it!

Also check out www.howtoflirtadvice.com or www.whatdoguyswantadvice.com

Will you be one of those who come aboard?

Because of the explosive growth of Online Dating – and especially if you yourself are single and looking for a partner online – it may be helpful to learn the best ways to use Online Dating Sites before actually joining one of them! As an Online Dating Coach, I want to help you make the best use of your time and money in your quest to find your Soulmate.

First and foremost, as in any relationship, honesty will be the most important factor in your finding a partner who shares your values and personal interests.

What type of relationship are you looking for? If you’d like to find someone who’s fun to be with so you can have some play time on the weekends, by stating your goal honestly right at the beginning, there will be a much greater likelihood of meeting someone who has the same vision.

One of the obvious side-benefits of this is your avoiding a series of uncomfortable conversations later about why you won’t commit to the relationship, or why you’re not willing to spend more time together, etc.

Another useful tip when entering the world of Online Dating is to match your choice of dating sites with the type of relationship you’re seeking. If you’re looking for a weekend companion “without any strings attached,” there are dating sites you can join whose members feel the same way. On the other hand, if your goal is to meet someone for marriage, you’d be better off starting with an online dating site whose members have the same intentions. As a Dating Coach, one of the first steps in working with new clients is my assessing their innermost values. By starting with this step, I can better recommend the dating sites that will deliver appropriate matches.

If you’re tired of random dating and not finding someone compatible, then my advice is to join the better known online dating sites which charge for their matchmaking services. Most of these companies use sophisticated compatibility software which match the subtleties of your unique personality. They will also match the basics like your marital status, religion, and education. By asking in-depth questions, and having you rate their importance, many online dating sites produce high success rates for meetings between the same clients. In other words, the match made through the dating service was pleasant enough so both parties wanted to see each other again after their first date.

Finally, to be safe in your quest to find your Soulmate, consider using an anonymous email address (through Gmail, Yahoo, Hotmail, or something similar) without assigning your true name (and certainly not your last name) to your account, nor should you include your home telephone number. It’s best to get to know someone through the dating site first, before providing this information.

After your initial online email exchange and perhaps one or two IM chat sessions, you should be ready (assuming all goes well) to make plans for a telephone conversation. The proper online dating etiquette would be for the woman to call the man first, blocking her telephone number from Caller ID. Only after one or two successful telephone calls should a face-to-face meeting at a coffee shop be scheduled.

In the interest of safety, always plan your first couple dates in a public place, and even better if it’s during the day. Do not pick up or ask to be picked up for the date. Meet each other at a mutually agreed upon location, and also agree ahead of time to leave each other from a public place so you can drive home in your own cars. If your potential date balks at the suggestion to not be in a vehicle together, look elsewhere for sure. It’s not worth your safety to try to figure out if the person you met online may just be over-sensitive or unaware of the “rules.”

By following these simple guidelines, you can make online dating a success. By the second date, if all goes well, trust should be established and you’ll be on your way to building your next relationship!